My New Year’s Resolutions

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Can’t believe I am NOT hung over this morning. Well, that’s one resolution I am already successfully accomplishing. #winning #overachiever – Yes I know I am almost 40 but for some reason, I wake up with more hangovers now than ever and I blame Uber for that – they make going out way too convenient.

Now, let’s talk about New Years Resolutions, we all set them because we are trying to better ourselves, right? Setting them with the intentions of trying to better ourselves so that we can obtain an ideal life that we have inside of our heads. Forcing us to give up those things we love so much.

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The problem is most of us break them. I met with some girl friends the other day and they joked about this. Giving themselves a week or two before they gave in. I think that’s because one of them was giving up sugar and the other one gluten. Which, I can kind of relate too. Back in college, I decided to give up fast food. Which is really hard to do when you hate the dorm food that was offered back in 1997, fast food was kind of the only convenient thing and I loved it so much. But I was NCAA athletic and knew it wasn’t good for me. So I did it. I gave it up! To this day, it’s probably the only new years resolution that I’ve ever actually stuck to all these years. But I did it because I knew it was good for me and I made a concise effort to make a lifestyle change. And that is what you have to do with to be successful with your resolutions/goals/intentions.

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So when you are setting your resolutions (yes, you still have time) or changing them, be realistic. If you set one about becoming a better person, achieving that promotion or finally saying no to that on-again, off-again lover, write down a few mini steps that you need to follow to succeed.

I’ve set resolutions to help me to achieve what I need to for my career (to make it happen) and my personal life (aka dating life). What’s kind of bizarre to me is that the goals I set for my career are not that attainable, I mean they are… but I think sometimes I think I am Wonder Woman. I set the bar really high for myself because I know I can do it as long as I don’t have any distractions. Which is where my goals for my personal life aka love life come in. These goals seem so attainable but scare the living shit out of me.

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You see, I’m the girl who works through her feelings. If someone breaks my heart, I work. I push through and avoid feeling anything real, or at least that has been pattern in the past and I’ve spent the last three years trying to change that. But it’s really F-ing hard. Especially at my age (I know that’s a lame excuse), but time is a ticking away and I feel so much pressure from society/friends/family saying, “your eggs are getting old” and that makes me sad, confused and I fall back into old patterns with men. I need to stop the vicious cycle of hooking up an ex, being one of many girls and be the girl, settling for random hook ups, giving it up right away and paying for my half of the bill. I deserve more and I am going to get it this year!

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So, I’ve made a list of qualifications for the next man who I hook up with date. He has to:

  • Make me laugh.
  • Has his shit together.
  • Set in his career.
  • If he has baggage, it needs to be handled.
  • Make enough money to be able to keep up with my lifestyle aka I don’t want to have to pay his way to vacations, concerts, etc.
  • HAS TO BE ATHLETIC!

What do think? Am I a missing a qualification?

But before you type it below, I need to disclose that I’ve been married before – yes, I didn’t tell you that until now. Sorry! See, I know what it’s like to get married because you are head over heels in love. I did that. I was young and thought love would be enough, but it wasn’t. So I’ve become careful, yet careless when it comes to dating, if that makes sense. I’ve been living the single life for 12 years now, and I love it! Minus the part where I never have a plus one (not that he actually enjoyed going out), don’t have someone to take care of me when I’m sick (he didn’t really do that either), someone to cuddle with other than my cat, or have someone to help out with basic house hold things while I travel for work. See I miss the little things that people take for granted when they are married or in a long-term relationship. Because of that, I think I view or look at guys different when I date them. I look at the whole package, what it is they have to offer me and what I can offer them and then how the relationship could work. If it seems like it’s going to be more trouble than it’s worth, then I’d rather be happy and single than in an unhappy relationship. But with that said, the last couple of years have been very lonely and this might be my last chance to find a really good guy to raise a family so I am going to line my ducks up in a row and really put forth an effort to make a change. 2018 is going to be my best year yet!

Happy New Year Everyone!! Wishing you all the best,

A. Thea

PS What are some of your new years resolutions?